Finding Your Anchor and Sanity: Navigating the Holidays in Recovery
Ah, the holidays! A time for twinkling lights, endless cookies, and the low-grade panic of trying to do five weeks’ worth of socializing in two. For anyone in recovery, this season is like a beautiful, chaotic obstacle course. It’s when your well-grooved routine gets hit by a blizzard of family expectations and sugar plums. We love the cheer, but let’s be real—it’s a lot.
But fear not! You’ve already done the hardest work. Now we just need a survival strategy. Think of this as your festive guide to making it through with your serenity—and sobriety—intact:
1. Your Meetings Aren’t Optional. They’re Your Life Raft.
You know that feeling when you skip a meeting because ‘you just don’t have time’? During the holidays, that feeling is a liar. That’s precisely when you need your people the most!
Schedule Them Like as if your life depended on it: Seriously. Mark your meetings as non-negotiable. If Aunt Carol’s party conflicts with your Thursday night group, Aunt Carol’s party is starting late for you. Your recovery isn’t a suggestion; it’s the foundation for everything else you love.
Embrace the Zoom Revolution: Thank goodness for the digital age! If you’re stuck at the in-laws house in the middle of nowhere, grab your phone, retreat to the least used bathroom and dial in. Your community is literally everywhere.
The Check-In Drill: Before you walk into any high-stress situation—say, a family gathering where someone is guaranteed to ask about your life choices—have a pre-game call with your sponsor or friend in recovery. It’s like a quick mental armor polish. Knowing you have an emergency escape hatch, your phone, is half the battle.
2. Self-Care Is Not Selfish, It’s Self-Care.
The holidays turn many of us into human-shaped people-pleasing machines. We forget to eat, sleep, or take a single quiet breath. In recovery, this is a recipe for a full-scale emotional disaster. Self-care is your main defense.
The Power of the Irish Goodbye, or Just a Good Boundary: You don’t have to stay until the last sequin has dropped. Go for an hour. Say, I have another thing, and then go home and watch an entire season of a show while wearing pajamas. A successful holiday is one where you respect your own limits.
Routine, even if it’s Tiny: The whole schedule is messed up, I get it. But can you still wake up and meditate for five minutes? Can you still get to the gym? Even maintaining one small, predictable routine will make your brain feel like it hasn’t completely been thrown from a moving vehicle.
When in Doubt, Hydrate: Seriously. Most holiday mood swings can be traced back to a combination of no sleep, too much sugar, and being severely dehydrated. Drink water. It makes you feel productive and slightly smug.
Schedule an extra session for yourself: Take the time to put your own oxygen mask on first. It can help to reset, re-evaluate and reconnect with yourself for which all your loved ones will benefit.
3. Hunt for the Small Joys - They’re Everywhere!
The stress comes from trying to force the perfect, Hallmark-movie moments. Instead, stop chasing the big events and focus on the tiny, quiet wins. This is where the real joy lives.
The Two-Minute Gratitude Burst: When you’re stuck doing dishes or wrapping a gift, don’t rush it. Take a moment to genuinely look at what you’re doing and appreciate it. “This cup of coffee is excellent.” “I can afford to buy this gift.” “Wow, I didn’t lose my cool when my uncle brought up politics.” These are the victories.
Be a Joy Tourist: Stop waiting for joy to come to you. Intentionally seek it out. Walk the block to look at the lights. Spend five minutes playing with a pet. Listen to that one song that instantly lifts your mood. These small pursuits are totally doable and have zero cleanup required.
The holidays are a speed bump, not a roadblock. You’ve got this. Keep showing up for yourself, lean into your support system, and give yourself a break. And maybe a cookie.
Stay connected!
Andrew Reichel